An Irregular Expression

What would have been WAY cooler is if the number of lessons I received this week were split up over, I dunno, 3 months.

That being said, I’m grateful when I get the downloads and have the time for reflection.

Surprisingly I’ve had ample time for reflection because the last 48 hours have been madness. I’m writing now from a luxurious hospital bed at Torrance Memorial where I’ve been in AFIB for going on 24+ hours.

It’s my first time experiencing this and I highly do not recommend. The prognosis is that this may not have been my first time in atrial fibrillation, that my genetics contributed along with dehydration, but apparently high performing athletes can go into AFIB and it’s certainly treatable, which is great news.

Did you see the part where I referred to myself as a high performing athlete. hehe.

Another reason to praise the Lord that we’re alive in this century.

Modern medicine is a blessing.

Honestly, I intended to write about my therapy session from last week but as the universe would have it - noooooo, I gotta write about my stint in the ER and more importantly, the way people express love.

It’s not an exaggeration that I know the best people. If you’re on this list I consider you a ‘best people person’ or ‘best people adjacent’ if we’ve never spoken. hehe.

It’s clear people are here for different life paths that may not be overtly obvious in the beginning. Some folks show up as beacons of light, incredibly thoughtful and patient listeners, problem solvers, straight clowns or deep inspiration in darkness. The way each person exudes a fractal of God the creator and shines into their best selves through purpose reminds me that we are never in the wrong place but we may not be fully expressed.

Sometimes you’re forced into full expression.

This will come as no surprise, but I don’t ask for help well.

I’ve gotten better after the deaths of Matt and Leland but it’s DEFINITELY not something I’m comfortable with even now … cue … AFIB!!

Fortunately I got to practice gratitude and trust by asking my best friend Alysha to take Beau and Moose and drive my dizzy ass to the ER along with 100 other small requests. She over delivered as did my friend Katie with a 7am breakfast smoothie and Vic and Lesley in bringing me dinner. As did my mother, father, brother, sister in law, cousin, and friend circle with non stop FaceTimes, texts, and check ins. So many people have reached out that I feel silly as it’s impossible to name them all but this is just a snippet of the goodness around me.

I watched the nurses, the physician assistants, the EMTs and the cleaning folks within the ER scatter and move through controlled chaos for nearly 16 hours on Sunday. I was blown away by how each person showed up ready to be in service. It’s been a while since I’ve spent extended time in a hospital, and there’s something remarkable about the humans that choose this as a career path.

I kept thinking, “You’re on your feet all day in Hokas (don’t get me started. I gotta keep my heart rate down so I can’t talk about it too much), in fluorescent light, at all hours of the day/night, listening to people cry and scream and complain. They’ve chosen this. I’m not saying that every person was thrilled to be there or even moving with a heart of service, but when you pull away and take a bird’s-eye view of the magic of an emergency room, there’s any energy of openness that represents the best of mankind.

UPDATE // My heart converted. Around 10:45am Monday my precious heart decided to get her act together and come back to sinus rhythm and beat normally!! Beau was thrilled, clearly. LOL He is - but this is teenage angst, you may remember it.

God is Good.

What I told a few friends over the course of this stay is that I think my delulu serves me well in situations like this because I just chose to connect with the human in front of me. I wanted to offer the energy of respect, gratitude and availability.

I want them to feel appreciated and seen. I tried to make them laugh (don’t worry my dumb ass head shots that Alysha plastered all over the ER was almost enough) because it was clear, this was some hard work.

As I was being transferred I noticed that word travels fast. Apparently my favorite ER nurse Joelle had told my night nurse Joy that I was a great patient and a fitness trainer. Kinda a hard sell on the fitness trainer bit when you’re in for AFIB but whatever…

The magic continued as I was wheeled up onto the 4th floor to my room 444.

I squealed.

That angel number means:

A couple of things have been true in this experience.

I’m certain, like I mentioned above, my delulu has helped me persevere with confidence and a sheer sense of peace. Not to mention all the many of you that were praying for me, which I swear to God I can feel to my bones.

Seeing these signs is something I really needed, because the last week or two had done a number on my nervous system.

This email is already too long, and they’ve already come in 15 times to check my blood pressure, so I’m gonna wrap it up, but I have a couple of requests:

1. Get your full blood panels done. Every year. I don’t care about your excuses.

2. Check your heart. I don’t need to tell you that heart disease is the number one killer.

3. Move your body because you can. Forced bed rest will always remind you what a gift it is to be able to move well and with ease.

4. Tell someone today you appreciate them while they are in service of their job. I don’t care what the job is. It’s a little ripple that we can all expand upon.

5. Buy some merch from my newly launched merch store because this hospital bill is gonna take me out. LOL (I kid. But also what’s better than an impulse buy dopamine spike in the middle of a Tuesday)

OKAYILOVEYOUBYEEE,

xx

Nic.

Ps. Today’s email song: I write all of these emails with different music each week. Might as well share w you.

Pps. * Tuesday QUICKIE YOGA IS CANCELLED PER THE OBVIOUS. 12-12:30pm pst. $10. A well rounded music based mobility focused yoga flow. This was created as a community class and if you ever need financial assistance to attend - please just reach out or use code NEWFRIEND to try a class for free. Sign up here.

* Saturday AVIATOR NATION YOGA FLOW 9-10am, 10:15-11:15am. In person, in Santa Monica. Come on out. Sign up here.

* Sunday AVIATOR NATION YOGA FLOW 10:45-11:45am. In person, in Santa Monica. Come on out. Sign up here.

Ppps. MERCH IS BACK!! I’m so freaking pumped to share that we are LIVE and you can purchase my BE REAL NOT PERFECT sweatshirt and SWEAT AND STILLNESS muscle tanks now. The sweatshirt fits as expected and maybe a little long, not boxy and the tank runs REALLY SMALL. The fabric is thin and it’s cropped. I wear a medium sweatshirt and large tank, if that helps.

Pppps. NEW EPISODE OF SHOCK AND Y’ALL IS OUT NOW. In this episode, I’m speaking with MIKE HAMMOND of Signal Relief. Mike is a serial entrepreneur, business leader, husband, father of six, and the founder of Signal Relief—a company on a mission to help people find relief from chronic pain without drugs, surgery, batteries, charging cords, or having to sacrifice a goat under a full moon. Because let’s be real... when you’re hurting long enough, you’ll try almost anything. What fascinates me about Mike is that he didn’t come from the traditional medical world. He came from business, innovation, problem-solving, and asking better questions. And one of those questions became: What if the body’s pain signals could be interrupted differently?That question ultimately led to Signal Relief, a wearable technology adapted from defense-industry applications that uses something called Neuro Capacitive Coupling to help clear pain signals and allow the body to communicate differently. Now whether you’re dealing with joint pain, nerve pain, chronic injuries, or you’ve simply become way too familiar with the phrase, “you’ll just have to live with it,” this conversation is going to challenge some assumptions.

As always, please download, subscribe, review … and let me know what you think:

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Oh wait. You’re still here … God bless you. I’m so forever grateful for your encouragement, listening, downloads, shares and feedback. Could you take a second to REVIEW MY SHOW? We have 102 five star reviews and that blows me away. Do I know 102 people? Regardless, if you’ve left a review THANK YOU SO MUCH and if you’d rather fork out your own eyeballs than leave a review, I respect that too. Click here if it feels good.